Curfew For 21-Year-Old Living At Home
Living with a 21-year-old child changes everything in your house. You may want to enforce rules for them but feel they may not be receptive. One example of such rules is a curfew.
Many parents are reluctant to set curfew rules for their older kids, but you shouldn’t. A curfew for your 21-year-old living with you is crucial, depending on the current circumstances.
Read on to learn more about what you should consider when setting curfew rules, why curfew is essential, and how to go about the whole process.
What To Consider When Setting A Curfew
The first thing to consider when setting a curfew is why you want to do so. Does your child come home late and disrupt the family? Do you stay up late at night worrying about them because you don’t know where they are? There may be many reasons why you want to set a curfew for your 21-year-old child.
Determine what bothers you about your kid being out of your home before setting the rule. Ensure you have a valid reason why you want a particular rule followed at home. Here are various reasons that can make you consider setting a curfew rule for your child.
If your 21-year-old came home and disrupted the family, you may want to set a curfew that everyone follows. This help prevents other family members from coming home late and disrupting everyone. Setting a curfew, in this case, is especially crucial if people have to go to school or work, as disruptions can result in poor sleep.
Moreover, if you have a family pet, the pet may be disruptive when someone comes home, leading to problems. You’d want to set a curfew when everyone is winding down. This way, no one will come after family members are in bed; hence, no disruption.
If you stay late at night worrying about your kid’s whereabouts, your sleep will be disrupted. Setting a curfew, in this case, will let you know when your child is supposed to be home. Moreover, you can ask your kid to text you anytime they change their mind about where they’re initially going, alleviating some worry.
Trust is another factor worth considering when setting a curfew for your child. If you trust your adult child, you’ll be sure they are going where they said they’ll go. However, setting a curfew will be crucial if you don’t trust them because you cannot be sure where they’ll go or what they’ll do.
Does your adult child usually tell you where they are going?
If yes, you may want to set a curfew depending on where they’re going. A later curfew may work fine if they’re going to a safe place like seeing a movie with a friend. However, if they’re going to be somewhere you feel unsafe, you may want to set an earlier curfew.
The same applies to parties, school, and work. If you don’t like the party environment, an earlier curfew will be great as it will ensure they get home before the party starts. An earlier curfew will also be ideal if your child has earlier classes or a job to report early. Such a curfew will ensure your child gets enough rest and wake up in time for school or work.
Why Setting A Curfew Rule is Important
- Creating a conducive family environment – setting rules helps keep off problems before they arise. It also helps prevent the problem from happening again. For instance, if your child once came home late and disrupted other family members, setting a curfew rule ensures that doesn’t happen again, and the home environment is conducive for all.
- Maintains peace and harmony – creating a curfew rule gives everyone peace that all family members are at home by a specific time. This removes the worry that your child is out there and you probably don’t know what they’re doing.
- Makes everyone know what’s expected of them – house rules are practical when everyone follows them. When every family member adheres to the rules, you help your child know what’s expected of them, including following the curfew rules.
How To Set A Curfew For Your 21-Year-Old
Most 21-year-olds are independent and want their freedom. Your child may forget how their actions affect others when they are exploring the boundaries of what they can do. Setting boundaries, in this case, signals to them where to draw the line.
Remember, your child may resist following the new rule at its first mention. That’s expected, as it’s typical for 21-year-old to expect to have all the freedom they think they deserve. Creating a curfew in such can be easy if you follow a few steps. They include:
Having a Discussion
The first thing you need to do is to discuss with your child why the rule is essential. Tell them how the boundary will create peace at home. Be open to suggestions and questions that your kid has to offer.
If possible, let your child have input about their curfew. Giving your child a say in their curfew makes them more likely to follow it.
The next crucial thing is to be open to change. Maybe you’ve set a curfew that creates issues with your child’s late shift at work. Be willing to change the boundaries if there’s a good reason.
By being flexible, your child learns you’re not trying to be punitive; instead, you’re creating a peaceful household. And if the curfew becomes a source of tension between you two, you can consider consequences should your child fail to comply.
Limiting their freedom when going out and doing additional house chores are good examples of consequences. If things don’t change and your kid refuses to follow house rules, consider asking them to move out.
Curfew is excellent at helping you and your family live with your 21-year-old at home in harmony. However, know that your child may resist it at first. What should you do in such a case?